We all get demotivated sometimes. It’s a natural part of being human.
Some days you have lots of energy and excitement to do your work or the things that interest you, and other days you couldn’t care less about those same things.
It’s normal.
But feeling demotivated for too long can make your world seem very grey and depressing.
So, it’s a good idea to find strategies that help lift you out of the doldrums quickly and cleanly.
How do you go from feeling demotivated to feeling energised, happy, and productive again in the shortest amount of time?
I’ll share how I do it.
But first let’s dig a little deeper into motivation itself. What is it?
The difference between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation.
In 1985 psychologists Deci and Ryan coined the Self-Determination Theory (SDT). This theory proposes that human motivation is influenced by the fulfilment of three basic psychological needs:
Autonomy: The need to feel in control of one’s own behaviour and decisions.
Competence: The need to feel effective and capable of achieving desired outcomes in our environment, through mastering tasks and gaining skills.
Relatedness: The need to feel connected to others, share a sense of belonging and have meaningful relationships.
SDT differentiates between types of motivation based on the degree to which they are autonomous or controlled:
Intrinsic Motivation: When you engage in an activity for its own sake because it’s inherently enjoyable or satisfying. Intrinsic motivation is driven by personal interest and the enjoyment of the task itself.
Extrinsic Motivation: When you engage in an activity to achieve an external outcome or reward. There are varying degrees of autonomy here ranging from praise and recognition to the internal pressure you place on yourself to achieve a goal.
Last week, Bean told me that he wanted to go to football club because he wanted to win a medal and a trophy.
As I pondered this for a moment, I thought about the night before when we were playing football in the garden together. He was hesitant to try out new things, only wanting to focus on scoring.
I said to him “you need to practice your ball skills if you want to be good at football.”
But what I should have said was “you need to practice your ball skills if you want to win lots of medals and trophies.”
Bean is extrinsically motivated.
At age 5, he is driven, not by the desire to nutmeg the ball through my legs every time, but rather by the external reward of holding a physical status symbol in his hands.
Like many people who are motivated by money, cars, praise, and other wonderful things that are, more often than not, outside of our control, being extrinsically motivated is extremely common in todays’ society.
At his age I was also like that.
These days, if I’m playing football in the garden with him it’s not because I want to win a medal for mummy footballer of the year, but rather because I would love to be good at it.
Why should you care?
Does it really matter what type of motivation you need, if all you really want is to find your mojo again?
Not really.
But it does help to understand yourself better.
If you’re intrinsically motivated, then you could find it easier to stay on track with your goals and aspirations because your reward for doing them is internally focused. It’s just satisfying.
Whereas those extrinsically focused are always waiting for the next thing to come along and kickstart their desire again. Whether that’s a beautiful walk in the hills, a promotion, or the latest gadget. It keeps their attention for a period of time and then they go back to feeling uninterested.
Regardless of motivation type, there are four things that I do to help me find my mojo when I’ve lost it.
Make space in the day to think. Many people are in back-to-back meetings, or too busy ticking things off the to-do list, to realise when they need some extra motivation. If I’m too busy, I start clearing my diary where possible and booking in some thinking time.
Physically go to a different place. It doesn’t have to be far. I might take a walk to the park, or even the bottom of the garden. But really I’m looking for a change of scenery.
If you can get big expansive views, then that’s even better. According to Andrew Huberman, a neuroscientist at Stanford, “panoramic vision” is associated with calmness and the reduction of stress, as opposed to “focal vision,” where your pupils dilate, narrowing your field of vision. This has a corresponding negative effective on your nervous system.
Think about the ‘why’ – I regularly need to remind myself of why I’m doing something, especially if I’m feeling flat and demotivated. Your why is your North Star. What do you want to achieve and why? What makes you tick? Is this why extrinsically or intrinsically motivating?
Gamify everyday tasks – to make them feel more engaging and fun. I’ve been using a hack from Ali Abdaal’s Feel Good Positivity book lately. It delivers a burst of energy when you ask yourself ‘if this activity was really fun, what would it look like?’ and then proceed to make that vision a reality.
To sum up
I believe overall that being intrinsically motivated is going to serve you better in life. But I’ve never met anyone who is always personally interested in everything they’re doing.
If your goal is to improve yourself, then surely that’s going to motivate you more in the longer term, and be relevant no matter what situation you find yourself in.
Whereas extrinsic motivation is likely to just leave you wondering – what next?
What’s your take on this topic? How do you find your mojo when you’ve lost it?
Have a good week.
-Selda
P.S. If you found this article valuable, don’t keep it to yourself - spread the word! Share it with your friends, family, and colleagues, and let’s help everyone to find their mojo again.
If you’d like to delve deeper into how you can best maximize the time in your week, book me for a one-to-one productivity power hour.
Thanks for reading and engaging Rasmus.
It’s great that you recognise that about yourself and you’re already taking steps towards the direction you want to be!
My dad always says, ‘when you know what you want you’re half way to getting it.’
Good read Selda!
I’ve come to realize I have been extrinsically motivated for most of my life, and still am, to a large degree. I’ve chased goals, not joy.
It’s certainly let me to some dark times, due to that pervasive feeling of “well, what’s next?”. Finding the mojo again is always an arduous task.
I want to be more intrinsically motivated. It’s one of the reasons I started writing. A method of connecting with what I enjoyed when I was young, something I do for fulfillment.
But I don’t think I can change that part of my nature. Yet, anyway. The lists must be crossed off, still. Hopefully someday I reach the point where it’s enough, and focus on the things I simply find enjoyable to do.